Thursday, June 24, 2010

Top Ten Parenting Tips

Some of these I have learned on my own, some are from the bible, my mom and my mentors.

1. Put your kids to bed! One of the biggest factors in a child's behavior is lack of sleep.  Children need 10 - 14 hours of sleep each 24 hour period. Give a child a consistent bedtime and give them enough time to sleep. Give younger kids a nap everyday. I promise, this will help improve their behavior!

2. Never name your child Grace. Not even the middle name! It is a self fulfilling prophecy that means you will need more grace for that child! Don't believe me? ask anyone who has a child named Grace!

3. Let your yes be yes and no be no. If you say it, mean it. If you threaten it, do it. It sounds simple, but I know it's hard. You are a parent now and can't afford to be too tired or too busy to follow through. Just think of it this way, you can either deal with it when they are 2 or 3 or you can deal with it when they are teenagers. I am not saying that if you are consistent when they are young, they will be perfect as teenagers, but if your kids know that you mean what you say, your word will go alot further when they are teenagers.

4. Yes, it is more important to play Barbie, hide and seek or star wars than to have a clean house. Your child and your friends don't care if your house isn't perfect. Your child won't even remember! But they will remember that you built a tent out of sheets in their bedroom or that you use to hide in the closet for hide and seek. I don't think you have to be your child's only playmate, but I do think parents should play, really play with their children everyday.

5. I think it is more important to have family time together than to be in a sport or other activity. If your family doesn't have at least 3 or 4 meals a week together, you or your kids are probably over scheduled.

6. The single most important gift you can give your child is an excellent relationship with Christ. Be a witness for Christ to your children by having a vibrant active relationship with Him!

7. The second most important gift you can give your child is to have an excellent relationship with your child's other parent. If you are married to them, love them with everything in you! Wake up every morning thinking about how you can out serve and show love to your spouse today. If you are not married to your child's other parent, never, never, NEVER speak badly of them! respect them and keep the lines of communication open with them. It is no longer about you, it is about raising your kids.

8. Teach your children how to handle failure, disappointment and injustice by handling it well when it happens to you. Own up to your mistakes. Sometimes, it really is your fault, not the circumstance or someone else's fault.

9. Allow your children's grandparents to spoil them. Everyone should have someone in their life that thinks they can do no wrong. It may take some "detoxing" once the child comes back home after a stay with the grandparents, but I think that is a small price to pay for the benefit of having another group of people that pour love into your child. Take it from someone who grew up without grandparents! It is an amazing gift.

10. PRAY specific, bold extraordinary prayers for your children everyday. God has great plans for them! Put them in His hands everyday.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

How old were the disciples?

This past year in BSF, we studied the book of John. I have never done such an in depth study of this book and I have to say, it has been an amazing life changing experience. (side note: every encounter with God's word should be life changing, shouldn't it?) Anyway, because of this, I have decided to study Acts over the summer. For the past few days I have been thinking about the disciples and the huge responsibility that was placed on them by Jesus and I wondered: how old were they? This is what I have come up with and I WELCOME and encourage those of you with far more theological and historical knowledge to add input.

It looks to me like all of them, but Peter, were between the ages of 16 - 20. I am basing my conclusion on a couple passages of scripture. Exodus 30:11-16 explains the Temple Tax and it says that all men over the age of 20 had to pay half a shekel. In Matthew 17:24-27, we are given the story of when Jesus and Peter pay the Temple Tax with a shekel that was in the mouth of a fish that Peter had caught. All the disciples were with Jesus at this time, so if they all owed the tax, why wouldn't he pay the tax for all of them? This led me to believe that all but Peter are age 20 and under.

The other thing I saw in my research and a sermon that Michael Lukaszewski preached recently, was that all Jewish males went to Hebrew school to study under a rabbi and to learn the scriptures until the age of 12. At that time, only the "cream of the crop" went on to continue studying to eventually become a rabbi and the others went to start a trade. Since the disciples were all in a trade, they would have started it at about the age of 12, so by 16 they would have been completely entrenched in that trade as these guys were.

So what does it matter? Well, it probably doesn't, but I think it's interesting. The fate of the entire church and the spreading of the gospel was put into the hands of a group of teenagers and young adults. Oh, and the Holy Spirit, which is the lesson for me: dependence on the Holy Spirit is the ONLY way to accomplish what God has put me on this earth to do.

Let's face it, I am completely inadequate to do just about everything that God has charged me to do: raise my children, be a good wife, be a good friend, be a witness for God. I am comforted by the fact that the disciples were inadequate too and they were still able to accomplish the task that God had given them, because of the filling of the Holy Spirit. I think for this, their youth may have been an advantage! I remember at that age thinking I could do anything, be anything and that I knew everything. This attitude of invincibility probably helped them to not focus on the magnitude of the task at hand. At the same time, knowing that they were young and small in number, probably helped them to lean harder and become more dependent on the Holy Spirit.

This is my lesson: Yes, I am inadequate, but I am serving and working for a completely adequate God! I must lean hard on the Holy Spirit and never take credit as if I had anything to do with it, besides having the priviledge of witnessing His work first hand as it happens through me.